Thursday, August 28, 2008


Does incessant chatter or noise ever bother you?

Noise that rises and falls. The clattering of notes too high or a notch too low for delicate ears to bear...

Sound that seems to ever grow and gradually becomes a blast of hysterical front stage music in an office environment, or a train compartment or queue in that multi-storey chain store. A vibration of the senses that eventually explodes like china clutter in one’s head and grows like an atomic bomb into an unbearable weight loaded with silent irritation that surpasses most other types of harassment on this planet.

I wonder if the animal kingdom experiences such vile little irritations? If insects or creepy-crawlies can get a nose-to-nose sniff with another creep of the same species or one who got lost or off-track and now sensor and breathes in the same space?

Office politics:

There seem to be souls in my office environment that have a disability to tone and frequency of their own voice and noise that they make.

We know there will always be someone odd with that long neck sticking out like a plucked ostrich. The weird one's who seem to be collectors of empty Indian take away boxes cluttering their desk and dustbin. The one that wears the same pair of socks each week, until it can virtually stick to anything... Just like the one who has to talk so loud that the business next door starts complaining.

Back to the animal kingdom again. Avian species have the benefit that they can pick themselves up and fly away with the option to emigrate. But what about our earth-bound friends, such as trumpeting elephants or marrula-drunk baboons having to share the same waterhole?

I like to think for each human there is an animal persona, whether bombastic, loud or hardly visible.

The pip-squeak mouse: Doesn’t seem to know it has vocal cords.
The duck – Ugly during adolescence, makes a monotonous soul-wrenching quacking sound when adult.
The bullfrog - Pervert at best of times with a French nasality
Crow – Bedraggled thieving droll creature to stay well clear off
Pig – A scumbag hiding behind a snorting and dirty appearance
Cricket – Can’t kill the bugger and an irritating nerd.
Cat – Unsocial allergic constantly sneezing type, a bit scary too
Snake – The freak who likes to hiss about everything
Chicken – Cackles self-importance to be heard above all the rest
Jack Russell – Fearsome bully and womanizer, once it slams its teeth in...
Peacock – Verbally abusive and pain in the butt

At work I am failing to cope with a loud-mouthed living entity that seems to suffer from an accursed love-my-own-voice-so-much virus for which the anti-body cure has yet to be found.

Colleague with loud voice enough to crack through the sound-barrier who;
- Doesn’t understand how to hold a telephone and mouth INTO it.
- Can’t talk on the office phone; but shout to be sure to be heard.
- Can’t talk on a mobile phone; but makes a cacophony of noise
- Puts mobile phone on speaker phone to hear the other person
- Puts mobile on speaker phone for the caller to be able to hear too
- Doesn’t belief in a one-to-one discussion; must includes whole office
- Is in undying love with own voice; must be heard above all and everybody else

I would probably put this person in a category of a disorderly self-important parrot. Don’t try to assume that this refers to a certain gender either. I m in fact not sure at all of how I should put it...


Brother Tobias said...

Try answering them very quietly...makes them sound silly shouting back.
Spent some time finding out what a Hadida is..cormoranty thing? Is it only found in ZA?

Foofy's Blog said...

Hadidas are Ibis with very thin & long beaks - pull worms out of the ground. One once landed behind cat Lewis and caughty him unawares. Lewis hid in a tree for a while before he dared creeping slowly down the bark with a very angry humiliated look on his little face!